WASHINGTON — The U.S. Department of Homeland Security shocked the nation last week, as Secretary Markwayne Mullin announced plans to halt all international flights to US cities containing bike lanes in a press conference Thursday morning. “I can’t stand those fucking things,” an agitated Mullin told reporters. “So pretentious, a whole section of the road reserved for some asshole in booty-shorts. Well, frankly that is not the kind of image these great United States want to po