OPINION: There's Just No Way to Know If I'd Like 'Euphoria'

CHICAGO — The eighth season of HBO Max’s Euphoria premiered last month and, for some odd reason, people are still talking about Euphoria. Now personally, I’m no stranger to the world of television. My peers know this. So they keep asking me what I think of Euphoria and how I’m liking the new season of Euphoria. It’s all been very exhausting, not because the last thing I want to do with my time is dedicate 36 hours to catching up on Euphoria. That would be absurd. The issue is that there is sadly no way for me to know if I’d like the show, so I best not bother.

This conundrum is actually something I’ve attempted to explain to friends in the past, assuring them that I’d at some point, probably, tried to look into checking out Euphoria, I’m sure. Unfortunately, if I’m remembering correctly, it just wasn’t able to be done. I think it was on the wrong app, or I forgot my password maybe? Not too sure. One thing I am sure of though: I guess I’ll never know if I like Euphoria. Aw, shucks.

Don’t get me wrong here, I’d love to check out Euphoria if I could. The way people have described to me the mixed bag of performances and shallow writing have just… wow. Sounds like they’ve really got something good there. So believe me, it’d be great if I could see it. I just don’t think it’s doable right now.

Just in the interests of being thorough, I just checked again. Like, just now while I was writing this I thought, “You know what? Maybe I didn’t try hard enough.” So I checked again. I looked into a roadmap of next steps I’d need to take in order to see if I’d like Euphoria and yea, no it’s just not something that I see happening right now. Sorry about that. Can you tell I’m really bummed?